Template:News: Difference between revisions

From PortlandWiki
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Line 10: Line 10:
=== Friday | October 22, 2010 ===
=== Friday | October 22, 2010 ===
[[File:Green-n-ez.jpg|thumb|Yo Homie! It's EZ Being Green!]]
[[File:Green-n-ez.jpg|thumb|Yo Homie! It's EZ Being Green!]]
'''Yo Homie! It's EZ Being Green!'''<br />
'''This turtle molested my dog!'''<br />
Sure, the Environmental Protection Agency paddled [[Portland General Electric]] on the bum bum earlier this month to punish the utility for the coal-fired air pollution its [[Boardman]] plant inflicts on breathing life forms. Despite these sins, the [[City of Portland]] managed to crawl onto "EPA's elite list of [[Green Power Communities]] for the city's extensive efforts to reduce its carbon footprint."<br />
Sure, the Environmental Protection Agency paddled [[Portland General Electric]] on the bum bum earlier this month to punish the utility for the coal-fired air pollution its [[Boardman]] plant inflicts on breathing life forms. Despite these sins, the [[City of Portland]] managed to crawl onto "EPA's elite list of [[Green Power Communities]] for the city's extensive efforts to reduce its carbon footprint."<br />
Go to stories:<br />
Go to stories:<br />

Revision as of 11:02, 24 October 2010

News

Saturday | October 23, 2010

Uncooped chicosaur.

Playin' Chicken
Portland "authorities" will let you kill three bums. Where are you gonna put that fowl li'l harem? A stylin' shallow grave, of course!
Go to story: Coop Dreams

Friday | October 22, 2010

Yo Homie! It's EZ Being Green!

This turtle molested my dog!
Sure, the Environmental Protection Agency paddled Portland General Electric on the bum bum earlier this month to punish the utility for the coal-fired air pollution its Boardman plant inflicts on breathing life forms. Despite these sins, the City of Portland managed to crawl onto "EPA's elite list of Green Power Communities for the city's extensive efforts to reduce its carbon footprint."
Go to stories:
Portland dubbed one of the country’s greenest communities with EPA designation
EPA: Boardman coal plant has been violating pollution rules since 1998

Thursday | October 21, 2010

Public-private leadership council.

Takin' Care Of Business And Workin' Overtime
"Leadership Council" frets that "Portland's hyper-pluralistic decision-making process" may disrupt public development schemes, concocted behind "closed doors," to lure "private investment." Proposes "Community Investment Initiative" to "overcome a uniquely Portland roadblock."
Go to story: Reserves used as template for investment Leadership Council idea

Wednesday | October 20, 2010

Barack Does Bridge City

Barack Does Bridge City
As the President rolls through Portland today, the burning question on the tip of every Portlandian's wagging tongue is: "Does Obama support U.S. Predator Drone Bombing Policy (USPDBP) in his Heart of Hearts (HoH)? Or is this kind of depraved folly the product of a Spiritually Dead National Security Policy (SDNSP) imposed by Nefarious Deep State Forces (NDSF) that infest the Wretched Bowels of the National Security State (WBNSS)?" Enquiring minds want to know!
Go to story: Pakistan, Afghanistan on Obama's agenda

Tuesday | October 19, 2010

When the Timbers were away, the Beavers could play.

Timbers Ready To Chop Down Some Trees!
But wait! Wasn't that the Beavers' job!?!
Go to story: Major League Soccer Expansion: Portland Timbers Sign Four Players

Monday | October 18, 2010

Shoes with a "smaller footprint."

Are You Stumbling Over Your Own Clown-Sized Feet?
Take heart! Chinese footware giant Li-Ning has established a "foothold" in Portland. Centuries of tradition practically guarantees wearers a "smaller footprint."
Go to story: Move over Carbon Footprint. The Chinese have landed in Portland to introduce a smaller footprint for runners.

Sunday | October 17, 2010

Beavers to migrate out of Beaver State.

Portland Beavers Will Migrate To More "Southerly Regions"
A Portland institution since 1903, the triple-A team is pawned off to a San Diego-based baseball executive.
Go to story: Portland Beavers Sold To San Diego Padres' Owner

(Go to older news stories >>>)