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Sunday | January 16, 2011
Portlandians As Easily Duped As Our "Illiberal" Counterparts
Social engineers and consent manufacturing practitioners heaved a huge sigh of relief after studies revealed that "progressive" Portlandians are as dull and easily snookered as our nation's most fervent flagwavers. The findings shed light on how citizen "outrage" is manufactured over paltry spending for bike boulevards and bioswales while nary a peep is provoked by the trillions of dollars spent on armaments and defense contractors. The city's bike plan is projected to cost $613 million over the next twenty years. This works out to a twenty-year total of $1,075.44 per Portlandian, or $53.77 per Portlandian per year for the next 20 years.[1] By contrast, military-industrial-Congressional complex expenditures are estimated to cost $1,254,500,000,000. This chalks up to $4,086.32 per Portlandian in 2011 alone, an expense that's expected to continue each year until the Pentagon manages to extinguish all lifeforms that might one day present a terrorist "threat."[2]
- Go to story: Portland Mayor Sam Adams' bike plan, derailed by politics and bungled sales pitch, rides through controversy
- Go to bike plan: Portland Bicycle Plan for 2030
Saturday | January 15, 2011
Portlandians Celebrate Wikipedia's Tenth Birthday!
And so does PortlandWiki! In fact, PortlandWiki runs on the same wiki software that powers Wikipedia. And if that's not geek enough for you, why not attend a local birthday celebration in honor of Wikipedia? It's happening this evening at AboutUs, 107 SE Washington Street, Suite 520, right here in Portland. Let's celebrate!
- Go to story: Happy Birthday Wikipedia
- Go to Wikipedia 10th Anniversary Party: Portland page: Wikipedia 10th Anniversary Party: Portland
- Go to AboutUs blog: Wikipedia10 Portland celebration at AboutUs, tomorrow!
Friday | January 14, 2011
Massive Solar Disk To Descend Upon Portlandians
"Take us to your sustainability leaders," is just one of the many demands made by the solar disk's otherworldly pilots. "Pay rents 20% above market rate" and "climb the stairs" and "shiver in wintertime; sweat in summertime" are a few of the others. Rumors that the solar disk invaders come armed with solar flare guns remain unconfirmed.
Thursday | January 13, 2011
Feds to Portland: time to start profiling based on religion or political views
After the attempted bomb plot in Pioneer Courthouse Square, it surely is time to call in the FBI to profile Portland religious and political minorities as terrorists. What's that? The FBI were the ones who entrapped Mohamed Mohamud into committing that attempted bomb plot in the first place? Who cares! Muslims and radicals bad!
- Go to story: Portland Town Hall Planned On Joint Terrorism Task Force
- Go to story: City Hall: Mayor Announces Location for Joint Terrorism Task Force Meeting
Wednesday | January 12, 2011
Greenlick To Bicycle Trailer Pullers: "Lose the kids."
State Rep. Mitch Greenlick (District 33, Northwest Portland/Forest Park) don't want you to pull no trailer full o' li'l tots with no bicycle. Maybe he reckons it's dangerous. Figures some car drivin' fool could run over the little ones, trailer 'n' all. Why don't somebody tell ol' Greenlick he oughta ban humans beings from drivin' them dang fool horseless carriages instead!?! That'll save a coupla lives, at least.
- Go to story: Oregon House bills would prohibit wearing headphones, carrying kids under six while biking - Updated
Tuesday | January 11, 2011
Filthy Lucre Update!
Last week, PortlandWikiNewsLeakers brought you a report about "a series of workshops about managing money" (Thursday | January 6, 2011 - "Now You Can Learn To Deal With Your Share Of The Root Of All Evil!"). Good news! Now you can learn about handling your filthy lucre from a public sector source: Multnomah County Library. Smart Saving is the library's new financial literacy program that "helps people develop the skills to plan a budget, pay off debt, save for retirement or college, invest, and make sound home buying decisions." The series begins Wednesday, January 12, 2011.[3]
- Go to story: Multnomah County Library's Smart Saving
Monday | January 10, 2011
The Banality Of The Bloody Ordinary
Bloody Ordinary is the "controversial examination of American injustice" through a reinterpretation of Harold Pinter's masterpiece, One for the Road. Directed by David Berkson (Readers Theatre Repertory), the story depicts a master interrogator and his torture victims. After the performance, political science professor Norm Diamond will moderate a "talk with" among the audience and the cast. "I wish I could say that this play's subject matter is dated, but unfortunately, it's not," says Berkson, who sees the production as a thought-provoking starting point, rather than an end. Bloody Ordinary opens at Blackfish Gallery (420 NW 9th Ave. | 503-224-2634 | www.blackfish.com) Fri., Jan. 14, 8 p.m. and Sat., Jan. 15, 8 p.m. Admission: $8. More info: www.readerstheatrerep.org.
- Go to website: www.readerstheatrerep.org
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